


Pull

by Pearla



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi(2017)
Genre: Bloodlines Spoilers, Dantooine, F/M, I'm wrecked you guys, Planet Naboo (Star Wars), Post-Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, Reylo - Freeform, Star Wars - Freeform, renporer
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-02-16 11:34:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13053192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pearla/pseuds/Pearla
Summary: Major spoilers for TLJ.Kylo Ren keeps coming back to her. Rey can't stay away either.





	1. A Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Major, major spoiler for TLJ. Why isn't there a TLJ place to put our fics? Was it just me or do you think they were reading some of our more prominent fic writers? Did we just get thrown a bone? I'm throwing this out here before I get too afraid and falter. Anyway, here's some trash.

**A Beginning**

 

The clash of their sabers leaves a sharp thrumming in her arms, it snakes its way down to her chest as she absorbs the weight of his swing. He draws back, lips pressed firmly together and eyes critical, assessing her form, she thinks.

“Supreme Leader?” A man's voice winds around them, echos. He blanches, caught out like this, shakes the hair from his eyes, robes inky as he pivots away, his attention wavering, he's gone the moment he fully turns away from her.

 

“Ben?” The word is out of her mouth before she fully grasps what it is she has said. It's just a word thrown out into the void. Gone before he can hear.

 

Rey disengages her lightsaber breathing deeply, wipes the sweat from her face. She's unconsciously pacing the room, thinking about how potentially damaging this situation had become. _Has always been_ , she corrected herself. The bond that Snoke had forced, hadn't faded but left them like this. For months they had been getting snippets of each other's daily lives.

  
It was completely unpredictable, a painful reminder to her of the choices he had made. The interactions had been tense for months, bitterly she had pushed him away.

At first, she spits, “Jedi Killer!” Jabbing her lightsaber at him, shunning and lashing out at him when he comes through to her. He eyes her, darkly, each time she pushes him away. The connection cutting out as suddenly as it started. It never is linked to anything specific. After the first few weeks, he doesn't go quietly, he's more insistent, lines at the corners of his mouth; desperately seeking something. She's tried to find anything to stop it. _Him_. Meditation helps.

 

It doesn't stop it forever. His days collide with hers, frequently at night, at times during the day. Rey isn't exactly sure, maybe a few weeks in... he'd started to reply sardonically before fading away.

 

She isn't fooling herself, whatever this is they do has always been complicated. 

 


	2. Hope

**Hope**

 

Then, during a sunny morning, she is hiking to a resistance outpost. The sun warms her as she puffs her way up a hill, a few miles south of Theed. It is the first time she'd really been able to breathe that she can remember.. since Luke had gone. _Not gone_ , she reminds herself, _part of the force._ Rey focuses on her breath, listening to the planets wildlife sing, the grass dancing under her fingers. The cold she feels shocks her from the moment, crawling up her spine, she opens her eyes to find him a few feet from her, the climate controlled shuttle leaking through the bond to her, leeching the warmth from the day.

 

He's watching her, with a look of _not quite bemusement_ on his face, it had taken on a much darker cast since he assumed his new role and he couldn't quite manage the look, it was too light. Instead, the looked contorted on his face, one lip turned up, but rapidly descending into an inquisitive lowering of brows, probing, “Where are you?”

 

This particular game of cat and mouse had been old when he started it. The bond wasn't good at giving details, he could see where she was standing, and without pushing through with the force to her mind he wasn't going to get the information he wanted. It was just stolen moments between them. Rey had begun to suspect that it waxed and waned with the attention and power they put into it. She had tried to steel herself against him, but he had been intensely persistent.

  
  
“Outside.” She shifts her weight from one leg to the other. “Enjoying the sunshine,” she tries her luck, prodding him, “How's the fleet?”

 

“Austere.” He hisses, eyebrows shooting up, “You look well.”  


There had been a brief period of time when she held out such hopes for him, high ones that came smashing down. _Liar_ , she thinks, but adds, “You don't.”

 

It's true. He looks unkempt, his hair is roughed up, his expression hinting at how unhinged he had become. _It's better than seeing him straight out of the fresher_ , Rey blinks rapidly forcing the image away. _He did look healthier then_ , she thinks as she shakes her head.

 

He looks disappointed at her comment, leans back a bit, distancing himself “I hate meeting like this.”

 

“You have no idea.” The words come tumbling out of her mouth, this is the first time they've truly spoken since she declined him, “Really.” The word hurts her throat, sounds as sore as it feels. The two of them had a frankness from the beginning, she'd missed that.

 

He's standing before a chair, a datapad perched on one arm, his robe discarded a few steps behind him; he still favors a simple tunic and trousers. Typically she can't see this far past him. He must be able to see the hill she's standing on, sloping downward, the details in the grasses surrounding her, she has to guess it must be so if she can see that much of his background.  


He swallows, visibly shaken, “I know.”

 

“No,” Rey lifts an arm, physically trying to ward him off, “You don't - ”

 

The bitterness is filling the bond between them, it is only going to be a moment before it cuts out, she can feel it this time.  


He steps forward, hands clenched,“Wait!”

 

“What do you want?” She forces the words out between gritted teeth, she can feel the tears burning at the edges of her eyes. She has cried in front of him before, she doesn't want to anymore.

 

Kylo Ren turns his hands up, placating,“I want to speak to you without so much bitterness between us. We're enemies. I know I shouldn't try, but I can't stop this.”

 

“You want a truce with me so you can bring the forces of the First Order down on us all without a fight?!” Rey was trying to remind him, humanize the monster he clearly was.  


“You suppose that is what I mean, clearly you've taken it that way.” The words are clipped, hissed out like before when he wore the mask, the same distance is there.

 

Her words land sharply, even as she distinguishes the vulnerability in his features, “You're just a snake that wants to use me for Resistance intelligence!” She can feel her words striking down on him, as sure as any blade.

 

He surprises her, rubs his temples, covers his eyes with his hands as he rubs in small circular motions, “No, I want whatever peace we can manage. I want to meet you in battle as an equal. I'm not Snoke.”

 

Rey cannot imagine a world without opposing Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. There is a desperation in his voice, like the lightest touch of his fingers against her own. Once she thought she saw his future so clearly and was mystified by the choices he had made. She hinges on that word, _peace_ , she thought they had reached it before.

 

She shudders, the pull of an aborted future before her, “Peace?”

 


	3. Without

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm dipping my toes back into writing and this work is more snippets of these characters than an actual meaty story.

**Without**

 

Leia was right, it was only a matter of time. They had hurriedly settled on Dantooine, gathering every bit of tech and every rusted ship they could, anything to buy them more time. Poe, Finn, and every available person went to work fixing every scuttled ship they could. Dantooine awed Rey, it was lush and verdant. It rained more here than Ahch-To. After long days of hard work, Rey could close her eyes in the small, mossy filled room assigned to her and sleep more tranquility than ever in her life.

 

Regardless of how peaceful it was, it never stopped the dreams. Some nights he was chasing her on Takodana. Rey scurrying away, climbing up a rock face, fingers numb, breath raspy. In dreams she wasn't wiser, often, she'd hide. He would always, _always_ find her. The dark of his cape blocking out the sun. Other times she was back to back with him, shouting to him and he would answer. Occasionally, he was reaching inside her mind, digging through her secrets, mouth soft, whispering in her ear, “ You're lonely...”

 

Rey wakes with a start and those nights, in the dark, she feels him through the force. He is there with her in some way. He comes to her in dreams, the bond transmogrifying their connection, spinning her hopes and fears into these circular patterns.

 

The sun is sneaking in through the cracks in the walls one morning and more than anything she wants a cup of caf, before the thought can solidify, she feels a shift in the room and spies him in the darkest corner.

  
“Rey.” He greets her simply, his voice low and calm.

 

“K-kylo.” She wants to call him Ben in her sleep-addled state, a mistake she feels will wreck whatever truce they have created. “How are you?” She winces inwardly at her civility. He does look better, his hair is brushed and he doesn't have the maniacal gleam in his eyes. _At least_ , she thinks, _he doesn't look so fanatical from here_. He's trying not to disturb her too much, the thought blossoms in her mind and she knows it to be true. Rey rolls to her side, using her elbow to prop herself up, to better watch the morning light crossing his face.

 

“Well enough,” he manages, his gloved hand covers his mouth, his dark eyes scan her from his chair. “You?”

 

“Good.” A shiver goes up her spine, without the mask he is much more disconcerting.

  
Kylo Ren has never been subtle, “Without Luke, how are your forms progressing?”  


“Fine.” Rey doesn't want to have any time for this, he's had better timing. She'd trade the intense Supreme Leader for the unhinged one right now. She felt this one was trying to drag her to a precipice and throw her off, he was _ulterior motives_ distilled. There is something akin to worry on his face today.

 

“I'd rather not have your help if it's all the same to you.” Rey feels the words more harshly thorough him, somehow, so much so that her stomach lurches with it.

 

“Fine.” Kylo's tone is quiet, clipped. He is assessing her from his side of the room, he hasn't budged, hand still firmly covering his mouth. “My contacts tell me something is happening on Coruscant, some kind of political gala, the Resistance members are undoubtedly involved.”  
  
“I wouldn't know.” Rey can feel the words tumbling out, she'd always been a bad liar, Leia, or Poe...had mentioned something about a meeting she was to attend. It was a way to get the funding they so desperately needed.

 

She can tell he isn't convinced, “You are to be shown off. She was always so good at that.” His hand moves from his mouth, drops to the arm of his chair.

  
_His mouth is the softest thing about him_ , she thinks and his dark eyes shift up to hers, he _hears_ it, she feels it just as instinctually when she lashed out at him. She squeezes her eyes shut, willing him away, determinedly not focusing on the look of shock on his face.

 

When she opens them he is gone, thankfully. She has to find something in the Jedi texts about this bond, she has to find a way out.

 


	4. Coruscant

 

**Coruscant**

 

 

Coruscant is vibrant in a way she never expected. The skyline illuminated before her, reflecting the colors of the sunset. The brilliant pink hues, the deeper lavender shades awed her as she takes them in. As soon as she thinks she had found her favorite world, she finds another to rival it. Rey can feel Leia humming with energy as she watches her. She leans over with a conspiratorial smile, "This is the best time of day to see it."

 

"Is it?" Rey can feel heat of her blood rushing to her cheeks, abashed at her lack of knowledge. What Leia made look so simple was her grounded understanding of politics.  As far as Rey  was concerned they were stepping into a viper's nest, an anxious feeling settling firmly in the pit of her stomach as the craft lowers them gently to a landing pad.  Rey could feel her heart pounding in her ears as the Mirrorbright trilled, powering down beneath their feet. They had officially arrived.

 

* * *

 

Rey is grateful beyond words there is no one to greet them,  simply  a mechanical voice on the speakers telling the time and station directions  . Leia's apartments are large, decorated in grays, silver, white. Flowers soaking up the Coruscant sun near every window giving the place a welcoming feel. Rey feels less anxious here. “Here. Here will do,” Leia keys in a code and motions for Rey to follow her. “These rooms were...” Leia has to force the words out, lips pursing. “Ben's.” She finishes, gesturing  widely  with her arms.

 

Rey wants to be grateful, instead, she's stunned. She never imagined she would wind up in his rooms. “Oh.” She manages and before she can get much else out Leia has turned to her, face stony and bleak as Rey's feels. Their failure to bring Ben back is a tangible thing between them.

 

“You did the best you could. I don't want you to ever feel like you didn't. It can be too painful at times to relive the past. I don't want you doing that here.” Leia's voice is full of tears, more than any she could shed, raw honesty laid before her, “We've got to focus on the future.” Rey's fingers warm in Leia's hands as she regards her.

 

“We will.” her voice feels wooden - eyes stinging as she holds back tears - for the first time since Crait. _Oh, stars._

 

Leia leaves her to reconcile with a few senators and get things set in motion.  She informed her that Poe, Finn, and Rose are running errands for the Resistance, gathering information and gear they will need for the coming days  .  Leaving me to my thoughts, Rey rolls the tension from her shoulders as she takes in Ben's spartan rooms,  similar to  Leia's, done in grays and whites  . She feels like an invader as she opens drawers, but she finds this doesn't stop her. In his desk, she finds ink, a calligraphy pen, in another drawer, a book full of practice strokes.  Flipping through it she can see his improvements, forming each letter, until, finally, he is writing  elegantly  looped words that Rey can't quite wrap her head around . Arubesh had been an effort to learn, Ben had mastered it.

 

The closet is full of thick brocaded shirts and pants, even a deep velvet blue cape, some items far more ornate than others  .  Rey snorts, embarrassed by her imagination, none of this seems like something he would choose  . It's hard to piece together and unite these innocent items with the man she has met.  Part of her imagines him here, dark head bent forward,  studiously  moving through the forms, turning these shapes into words  .  It's harder to see him  willingly  turning to face her in anything other than black robes and a  staggeringly  pale face .

 

A tinge of recycled air hits the back of her neck, catching her red-handed in a dead man's closet, a sound escapes her as her stomach churns .

 

“Scavenging? I hope these rooms offer you what they couldn't to me.” He speaks  softly, amusement coloring the words, no trace of resentment in his voice. In the close quarters of this room, it feels like a knife scraping across the back of her neck.

 

Rey has to breathe, center herself before she can face him. _Who is he today?_

 

Sensing this, he stands straighter as she turns. He still isn't wearing the mask, clean and bare faced, lips pressed together.

 

He's waiting for me to assess him, the thought sparks in her mind, momentarily lost in the blank slate she has tried to turn her mind into. He's somehow as lost her now and as receptive when he delivered her to Snoke. His eyes always give him aaway, Rey thinks,  guiltily  hiding her hands from his roving stare.

 

“I like the cape.” The words are out of her mouth, bland...but meant to spurn him somehow. He doesn't look unkempt and shattered today, today he looks like a leader.

 

He smiles at her, “My mother meant it as a reminder to the Senate, to remember a dead man.”

 

Kylo Ren paces the room before her, avoiding her eyes. “How is Coruscant?”

 

“It's beautiful. I'm -”

 

“Intimidated?”

 

“Yes, that exactly.” Rey feels the bond demanding the truth from her, pulling the words from her. _Or is it him?_

 

“Coruscant is  entirely one  political machination after another, every step you take has more meaning than you will understand . My mother knows this and will use it.”The words come out breathy, desperate, he is telling the truth.

 

However  this bond words, they are under the same spell.

 

Kylo Ren crosses his arms before her – stalwart – Rey wraps her arms together, mimicking his stance . He regards her, eyes raking over her hers, his mouth twisting. Rey feels captured by his gaze, but he turns his head, breaking it. He disappears before he can say what he wants to.

 

They had  been interrupted  again, whatever he was going to say  is lost  to her. The words that sting the most and running through her head over and over, _“My mother knows this and will use it.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who is that dead man Kylo Ren is referring to?


	5. Gala

**Gala**

 

“That's the one...” Leia hums and brings her fingers briefly to her mouth in satisfaction. Rey had awoken to Leia calling her from the other room. Morning finds her splayed haphazardly across Ben's bed, her left hand buzzing from a lack of blood flow. Leia's sitting room is full of more clothing than she thought it possible to contain. A droid chirps at her in expectation, pushing one into her hands and grabbing at her top urging her to disrobe.

 

Leia drives her to try on dress after dress, ordered from all over the galaxy in hues and fabrics Rey could never have imagined existed. After the fifth or sixth, maybe it was the eighth? She finds the ones from Naboo feel the softest, slipping against her skin. Two have blood red flowers embroidered into every inch.

 

The third one is lilac and exposes so much flesh that Rey blushes all the way down her neck and balks at turning to face Leia, modestly covering her chest.

 

Leia fingers one dress with a naked longing so remarkably like Ben that Rey swallows the lump forming in her throat. It's an ecru folded crepe with a dotted overlay, but she eyes Rey with slight disapproval once it's shimmied on, “Too bridal.”

 

The twelfth dress has a sheer black overlay over a form-fitting top, it flows down to the floor shifting from mauve to rose pink, and finally, creme as she turns. This is the dress Leia chooses with a wolfish glint in her eyes.

 

* * *

 

 

Rey had never felt this many eyes on her, she uncomfortably shifts the flute of Daruvvian champagne hastily snagged from a serving droid. _Oh stars_ , the force is alight with all the bodies singing to her; beginning at her fingertips and spreading inward. It's heady, though that could just be the warmth of the alcohol spreading through her.

 

She catches herself thinking political galas are something she could _almost_ enjoy. Vacillating somewhere between fascination and sheer discomfort at the attention given to her. A whistle and shout from her left draws her attention. Poe, Finn, and Rose are winding their way through the crowd to her. Finn's face is shining with joy as he looks her over. He tugs her into a quick hug that spills a bit of her champagne, stage whispering, “You look amazing!”

 

Poe and Finn are wearing simple white shirts and dark pants with knee-high boots. Rose bobs on her heels, dressed in a pink and white ballgown, lips a shocking fuchsia as she beams up at her.

 

Poe hangs back, dark eyes drinking her in, a heavy glass of Corellian brandy slack in his hand. “You're beautiful” His voice catches, a corner of his mouth crooks up, proud and full of good humor. Before Rey can respond to Poe, Finn shoots him a cutting glance and Rose, “How did they ever talk you into wearing a dress? It's gorgeous.”

 

“Leia was insistent...” Rey smiles at Rose and carries on, “Where have you all been?”

 

At that, they huddle together, pulling her into the fold. Finn launches into an explanation, tripping over words, “They had us running reconnaissance. Data mining for any information on the people here. There are some serious players here tonight. If we do this right we can get the backing we need.” He nods to a Mon Calimari gentlemen passing by them.

 

“We're here on our best behavior, making sure Leia looks good and to keep an eye on things.” Rose races ahead of Finn, afraid of him saying too much in front of people. “It was good to see you, but we need to get back to our job.”

 

“Okay.” Rey feels the loneliness settle in the pit of her stomach. She nods to each as they separate, dispersing into the crowd. Rose is the first to go, Finn gives her free hand one final, gentle squeeze.

 

Poe is the last to go, downing the remains of his brandy, Adam's apple bobbing. He smiles again, appreciation in his eyes, “Save me a dance?”

 

“Sure.” Rey can feel her face heating as she turns away from him in shock. Being so openly admired equally terrifying and thrilling.

 

Leia is before her in the crowd, introducing her to a golden-furred Loneran, “My dear friend Varish Vicly.”

 

“Oh, Leia, look at her! She's a vision in that dress.” Varish leans in conspiratorially, “Nobody here knows what to do with you!”

 

Leia and Varish laugh together as Rey colors and sips her champagne. Leia wraps an arm around her, wiping tears of mirth from her eyes, “They really don't know what to do with you. You're just being observed. I'm sure they are just worried you'll choke someone into submission. Coruscant nowadays doesn't have the bravery of ten years ago. Tomorrow we'll pick a more subtle dress.” Leia winks. 

 

Leia and Varish wade through the crowd. Once again leaving her in a sea of people too afraid to do much besides titter and give her sidelong glances.

 

She shivers and turns feeling one more pair of eyes rest on her. The weight of them mentally staggering in their overpowering intensity. Rey spies him through the cluster of bodies, a dark shade amongst scintillating light. He is at the far end of the room, pulling back into the shadows.

 

His mouth quirks as he regards her, he is the brightest and most solid she's ever seen him in the force bond; firm lines brought into sharp focus. He mouths a word to her, it echoes in her mind, “Come.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://pearlaabsinthe.tumblr.com/post/171511367767/elie-sabb-design-im-just-stealing-this-for-rey
> 
> There, I can't embed it cause I'm a noob.
> 
> I want to thank Halsey's Control and Ruelle's War of Hearts for contributing to my background noise as I wrote this. 
> 
> Look at that! Two updates in one weekend! That's so much for someone like me.
> 
> Is anyone else dying to get their hands on the TLJ novelization?

**Author's Note:**

> Force bonds are now really, really in your face canon.


End file.
